WHAT WILL YOUR LIFE LOOK LIKE IN 2019?

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What ?????? Am I really talking about 2019 when we are only a few days into 2018 - or could this be another one of my notorious typos? 

When you can’t change the direction of the wind – adjust your sails, 
— H. Jackson Brown, Jr, 

This quote is one I personally hold onto when the going gets tough and I am feeling a bit overwhelmed by the things I can’t control - very much like a captain fighting the winds of a storm.

The only things you can change are those in which you control. Therefore, you need to find a way to “adjust your sails” and look to the future rather than looking back at what didn’t work or fear the unknown which is ahead.

If a sailor knows a storm is coming from a certain direction, he or she will adjust the sails and let the wind blow them safely out of harm's way. They know that remaining on the same course might mean facing a storm that could cause a disaster and sink their boat.

The same principle applies to your life. Continuing on a course where disaster is looming might make it impossible for you to get out of the “storm,” and find safe passage.

It may be difficult to change a course that you’ve been on for a long time because the route is familiar and even though filled with turmoil, it can be strangely comfortable. Taking an unknown course of action may be scary, but necessary if those changes will bring you success and happiness.

The first thing you must do to rid yourself of fear of the uncharted course and decide where you want to land. Then you must stop negative thoughts from knocking you off this course. Practice replacing negative thoughts (the lies we tell ourselves) with positive ones. Mentally prepare yourself by gathering knowledge about your new course of action; visualize reaching your goals and create new resolutions by speaking the truth to yourself (positive affirmations). As I tell my clients, “Be careful what you say because YOU are listening”. You may still run into situations where you feel unprepared – and you may make some wrong decisions on the path – but, perseverance, positive attitude, and determination will help you stay on course through the dark and stormy times so you can joyfully reach your destination.

Next, remove the negative elements from your life. This may be extremely difficult, because the negative elements may be some of the people closest to you. They may be your coworkers, friends and even family. But by setting healthy boundaries you will be better equipped to rewrite the negative tapes in your head that have held you back from reaching your goals and becoming all you were created to be.

So yes, - 2019 is exactly what I meant – begin to set your goals and envision the life you want to be living one year from now. Take action, keep your eye on the prize. As simple as this may sound this formula truly works. I know - I’m living it.

If you need help defining your goals or creating an action plan feel free to reach out to me by filling out the form below.

Happy New Years 

"I am passionate about helping others reach their full potential" 

Life Coach

Cheri Tillman MBA, CLC, CWNC

 

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How to Survive Failure

Let Failure be Your Stepping Stone to Success

   

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Boxers know that the outcome of a fight is determined before the actual fight. Your chances of winning are based on how much training you put in versus your competition. What's more, it's based on your mental attitude. If you're scared of your opponent or if you're too 'in your own head' then you will be more likely to lose. You'll be more likely to fail.

The same goes for pretty much everything in life. Your chances of victory or failure are based on the way you prepare for the event and the outcome then just 'plays itself out'.

And that's why planning can help you to survive every situation.

How to be Ready for Failure

The problem is, that too many of us plan only for victory. We make plans based on the assumption that everything will go well and that we will have good fortune. This is a result of a generally positive attitude but it's unfortunately not always the smartest move.

What's smarter than is to make sure you're also prepared for the various contingencies. What will you do if you lose your job? How will you cope if your partner leaves you? What will you do if the project you've been working on falls through?

This is an attitude that is always taken by businesses because they know it's smart to plan for failure. They will have plans of action based on new releases going well but also just as many that are based on them going badly. Likewise, they will have plans for things go 'just okay'.

By being ready for every possible outcome and contingency you will always be ready to deal with situations as they arise and nothing will catch you unawares and unprepared.

Making Plans

When making your plans, it can often be a good idea to think of them as a flow chart. Rather than a to-do list, a flow chart works better because it takes into account the fact that situations can change and are uncertain. Your plans should take the form of an 'IF' and 'THEN' approach.

To do this, you need to apply a little imagination in thinking of the things that could go wrong. You need to make contingencies not only for likely outcomes but also those that are perhaps less likely. As such, it can also help to look back at past failures and to assess them honestly.

By doing this you will have a plan for dealing with every possible scenario. You'll survive any failure and you'll be confident no matter what happens.  So we encourage you to internalize the idea that failure is not the end but may simply be your beginning.  Here are a few examples of where failure wasn't the final chapter.

 

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  • Steven Spielberg. His cinematic output has grossed more than $9 billion and brought him three Academy Awards, but the master of the blockbuster failed to be accepted twice when applying to the University of Southern California's School of Cinematic Arts.
  • Oprah. She’s a billionaire with her own TV channel and a penchant for giving away cars but Oprah Winfrey was fired from her first TV job as an anchor in Baltimore.
  • Walt Disney. Can you imagine your childhood without Disney? Well it could easily have been if Walt had listened to his former newspaper editor. The editor told Walt he ‘lacked imagination and had no good ideas’. Undeterred, Old Walt went on to create the cultural icon that bears his name.
  • Albert Einstein. His name is synonymous with intelligence yet it wasn’t always that way for Albert Einstein. As a child he didn’t start speaking until he was four, reading until he was seven, and was thought to be mentally handicapped. He went on to win a Nobel Prize and altered the world’s approach to physics. I guess he was just thinking of the right thing to say for those first four years.
  • R.K. Rowling. Before there was a wizard, there was welfare. Rowling was a broke, depressed, divorced single mother simultaneously writing a novel while studying. Now one of the richest women in the world, Rowling reflects on her early failures:

 And the list goes on and on -  from Michael Jordan, Abraham Lincoln, Thomas Edison, Vincent Van Gogh, and so on.  

 Moral of the story :  Don't let failure be the reason you fail,  but ratherthe beginning of your success.  

 

We would love to hear your failure to success stories.  You can email your story to Connect@totalwellnesscenter.com or we can be reached at (310) 461-4107.  Don't forget to sign up below for our weekly Newsletter packed full of inspiration.

Total Wellness Team

Passionate about transforming lives.  


 

   

Five reasons you might want to consider a career coach.

We have all heard the latest news:  "Unemployment is down and job creation is up"

Well, tell that to the thousands who are still seeking work. Just this weekend I spoke with several individuals who speak a different truth.  One young man shared his story of finally finding a job 2000 miles away from where he lived and the excitement he felt.  However, just 6 months later the company was bought out and he is currently fearing his job will be eliminated.  Then there was a woman who told me her company was growing and she is looking to hire 2 new individuals.  Now that sounds great except she continued to share that one position received almost 400 resumes and the second one received over 60. I am not an expert on the US job market but I do know there are just few too many jobs available to meet the growing demand for employment.  And the few jobs that are becoming available barely pay a wage that covers living expenses.  

So how does a career coach change the job market? Simple answer, they don't,

But here’s what a good career coach can do.

  1. They can help you stand out above all other applicants. Within just a few sessions a career coach can evaluate the strength of your resume, conduct a mock interview, identify your strengths and your weakness and offer a strategic growth and improvement plan putting you at the head of the pack. 
  2. Assess your core values and align them with your career and potential employer. Too many times people accept a job with a company that "thinks" differently than they do resulting in frustration, stress, and dissatisfaction. The results of this mismatch can be seen in health problems, relationship struggles, emotional pain, and eventually end up in unemployed … again.  
  3. Improve job success rate. The call finally comes in from HR and you got the job.  Time to celebrate!  But wait - the real work is just beginning. The statistics show that over 40% of executive level new job hires fail in their first 12 months.  A coach can help you create a successful 30, 60, 90 day plan and equips you to hit the ground running.  A well designed plan will move you from a value consumed point (where you take up more resources than you contribute) to a break-even contribution level at a faster speed increasing your visibility to the leadership team and resulting in job security.
  4. Prepare you for the promotion. If you are one of the fortunate ones who have a great career with a great company but want to rise within the organization, a career coach can be your best advocate. You've heard the saying "You don't know what you don't know". This never rings more true than with individuals trying and trying to get the next promotion but missing the mark. It is normal to be blinded by our own assumptions and expectations.  In fact, sometimes what we see as our strengths can attack us from behind and become our biggest weakness.  When we fail to recognize this (and many of us do) we keep ourselves from being the 1st choice.  A trained career coach can help assess the things you don't know and help you turn the "don't knows" into your core competencies. 
  5. Start your own company.  If you are at the point where you no longer want to put your future in the hands of others and you desire to create your own business - I strongly advise you to seek out a qualified career coach. In this situation your career coach should have experience in start-up companies.  They can walk you through a marketable business plan from raising capital to the launch.  Some coaches can tell you "been there, done that" but before hiring one make certain they can say "been there, done that, and succeeded". 

For many of us it can be tough to admit we could use someone's help, especially if we've created our own success in the past. I recently coached an individual who spent 18 months searching for a job. He had many years of success under his belt and felt no need for a career coach.  Through the coaxing of his spouse, he reached out to me and within a month he landed a top paying executive job.  

The moral of this story is - You don't know what you don't know but don't be afraid to ask someone who may help you see what you can’t see so you can find your way to the career of your dreams.

It is worth the investment. 

 

3 Steps to Nail a Marathon Interview

Before, During, and After

The good news is your resume caught the attention of HR and you've just nailed the phone interview.  Now the challenging news - you are scheduled for an all-day marathon interview with the company's key departments. The day-long interview is a great opportunity for a company to get a picture of who you are, but also for you to see the many moving parts of an organization. So while these days can be exhausting, try to see them in a positive light. Just be prepared, and you'll do great.

 Step 1:  Prepare

  • Prepare both mentally and physically for a very long day.  Many corporations will offer high potential candidates the opportunity to interview with many departments and key decision makers all in one day which can prove to be one of the most stressful events in your job search. Being prepared is critical for any interview but especially critical for the multiple step interviews.
  • Know your audience. 
    • Research the company thoroughly and be prepared with a list of perceptive questions on the company itself and the specific job position you are interviewing for.
    • Request the names, title, and areas of responsibilities for each individual you will be meeting.  Research each interviewer on LinkedIn
  • Organize your portfolio the day before – Resumes, notepad, pen, along with your business card. You will need a resume for each person you will be ask to interview with - always have extras for the unexpected add-on interview. Leave a business card behind with current contact information. If you do not currently have a business card go online and create on through Word or Pages.
  • Be prepared with the three take aways you want to leave each interviewer.
  • Pack an emergency care pack in your briefcase - tooth brush, deodorant, and breath mints.
  • Eat a light meal and get a good night sleep the night before.

Step 2:  Day of Interview

  • Embrace the fact this is going to be a long day, review your notes you previously prepared.
  • Eat for energy.  All day interviews can drain even the strongest individuals. Make certain your breakfast is packed with the nutrients that will keep your brain alert and your stomach quiet.  Also, throw snacks into your briefcase, such as; nuts, fruit, even dark chocolate is good if you need a quick caffeine boost.  
  • Dress for success – an old cliche but still rings true today.  Select fabric that will still look good at the end of the day (Linen may look good first thing but by the second interview you will look like you just crawled out of bed).  Always dress professional, better to be over-dressed rather than under-dressed.  Remember it is going to be an all day event so make certain you are comfortable.  
  • Direct questions around the role of the interviewer - They want to know you are authentically interested in them as well as the different departments of the company. 
  • Take notes: This will help you when recapping your day, along with each interviewer's Thank You note.
  • Take breaks between interviews.  If they rush you into the next room simply ask for a bathroom break or a glass of water.  Take a deep breath, reflect, and refresh for the next one. 
  • Enter each interview as if it were your first one.  Yes, you may have answered the same questions five times already but remember the person interviewing you sees this as a stand-alone so start it strong and end it strong. You never know which interviewer will be the "make or break" when the team gets with HR to report.

Step 3:  The Wrap Up

  • Take a few minutes before you head home and review the day’s notes.  Make sure to follow up on any action items or request - the sooner the better. 
  • Send personalized thank you notes to each person you interviewed with and let them know you appreciated their time.  

Whew.....it is over and you did great.  Your hard prep work paid off and the company realizes you will be a great asset to their organization.  Congratulations!